A biker gang vs. a Japanese high school. The school hires some kickass ladies, including some lady wrestlers, to help them. Things get pretty rough and this has a weird mix of comic book action and pinky violence-type assaults. There's rape, vagina burning, a gal hung on an upside down cross and generally lots of abuse of women but also a lot of women getting revenge and kicking ass. YOJIMBO gets name-checked though the plot is more closely inspired by THE SEVEN SAMURAI. A good watch but I'm still not sure what Madonna has to do with any of these goings on. AKA GO FOR BROKE
This is a sentimental favorite from back in the VHS rental days. I think the thing I like most about it is that it mixes a few different genres together slasher movie/revenge flick/teen drama and it wallows in a great 80s Los Angeles sleazy environment. In addition to this all the characters here are bonkers. Comedian Dick Shawn in drag as Angel's fairy godmother, the always wacky Susan Tyrell as his mate/insult-trading partner, Rory Calhoun as a lost-in-time cowboy and a killer(John Diehl) who is a literal egg-sucking hooker-killing nutjob. Our main character played by Donna Wilkes is supposed to be a 15-year old prostitute but clearly is not and that's probably a good thing.
There were 3 sequels to this. I've only see 2 of them and just found out about the 4th one where our Angel has become a blond. Sadly Wilkes never returned to the series and Angel is played by a different actress in each subsequent movie.
This is one of the wackier movies I've seen in a while. What we got here is a French horror flick that starts off like it's going to be a slasher gorefest(something along the lines of OGROFF also from France) featuring a mutant Nazi killer before it then turns into a fever-dream involving a possessed horse, a mummy(complete with bride), a black cat(that gets tossed around in various scenes) and an old murderous hag. Director Bernard Launois seems fairly incompetent with his repeated act of cutting to the same scenes over and over again but somehow he did manage to make 6 previous films before this one so I guess someone believed in him. Obviously this is for real hardcore aficionados of low-brow trash cinema only.
This is a pretty fun zombie flick. better known as TOXIC ZOMBIES, about some pot farmers who get sprayed with an experimental herbicide that turns them into murderous cannibalistic(bloodeating?) maniacs. John Amplas, MARTIN himself, shows up as one of the evil federal agents. While it's no all-time classic it's certainly a good watch for zombie/gore completists.
The video version of this is slightly longer with a tacked-on ending that doesn't add anything of importance to the plot.
Released on video in England(one of the video nasties) as FOREST OF FEAR:
Director Penelope Spheeris followed her 2 punk rock classics(SUBURBIA and THE DECLINE OF WESTENR CIVILIZATION) with this tale of 2 directionless losers(Charlie Sheen and Maxwell Caulfield) who graduate high school, take a trip to L.A. and become homicidal killers upon arrival. There is still a punk aesthetic here, with the soundtrack featuring Iggy Pop and The Cramps among others, but this is clearly Spheeris' first step into mainstream Hollywood which I don't personally find quite as interesting. The film makes a good attempt at portraying teen alienation and misdirected violence in a somewhat realistic manner though it seemed like these 2 knuckleheads should have been apprehended much sooner than they were since they made zero effort in covering their tracks at any point. Despite this still an interesting 80s thriller that falls somewhere between teen melodrama and chilling serial killer dramatization.
Frank Zappa's daughter Moon Unit shows up in a small part as a classmate.
The Shaw Brothers studios give us a kung fu movie mixed with some pretty hardcore horror elements here in this tale of a couple of opposing martial arts masters who get involved with a psycho lantern-maker who uses human skin for his snazzy products. As you can guess things get pretty bloody as women are kidnapped and hacked up in something that might remind you of THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE PART 2 mixed with a more standard revenge-fueled Shaw outing. Our killer even wears a crazy monkey outfit with a skull mask for extra fright-inducing. A good one for kung fu maniacs also into bloody horror. AKA HUMAN SKIN LANTERNS
I've always considered this to be one of the dumber animals run amok movies out there but upon a recent re-watch I found it to also be pretty damn entertaining. Of course you get armies of killer man-eating slugs with big chomping teeth who can swim(leading to some JAWS-rip-off scenes), some pretty gory deaths as people's skin is ripped right off(this was directed by Juan Piquer Simon the man responsible for one of the greatest slasher movies ever PIECES so you know what to expect) and our hero is a health inspector named Mike Brady(Michael Garfield).
It is all based on a book by Shaun Hutson who apparently never allowed another film based on any of his books after this which seems like a terrible business decision!
Released in America as THE BIG BRAWL, this was Jackie Chan's first big shot at international stardom. Kind of reminiscent of Clint Eastwood's EVERY WHICH WAY BUT LOOSE since it concerns a street fighting tournament mixed with some comedy(sadly no orangutans though). Features bald tough guy wrestler Hard Boiled Haggerty as the main baddie and Kristine DeBell from that adult version of ALICE IN WONDERLAND as Jackie's girlfriend(and even though this is set in the 1930s and we do hear people use the "chink" slur no one seems to mind this interracial couple.). A entertaining enough watch but it would take Mr. Chan another 15 years before he would really become the breakthrough star, outside of just being loved by hardcore kung fu fans, with RUMBLE IN THE BRONX.
I was initially under the impression that this was a DEATH WISH-rip-off but it's really closer to something like DIRTY HARRY since our main character, played by porn star and Jean Rollin regular Brigitte Lahaie, is a cop who doesn't play by the rules. It also kinda reminded me of a Cynthia Rothrock movie, except with way less impressive fight scenes(This does predate most of those also). A decent enough, though mostly forgettable mix of action and sleaze. There is one stand out scene with a couple of criminals dressed in some insane wardrobe(a pink motorcycle helmet and skeleton suit seem like a great Halloween costume!) for no apparent reason that I'll probably remember most of all.
This 80s sword & sorcery epic is seemingly influenced by CONAN THE BARBARIAN which came out only a year earlier but I saw it before CONAN and it was in fact the first movie my family rented back when we first bought a VCR in the 80s. Full of boobs, butts, rape and quite a bit of gore this is clearly not a family movie but as a young teen I sure dug it. Not having seen it since those days I must say it really holds up as a great example of 80s exploitation brought to us by Roger Corman's New World Pictures. You get a pig-headed warrior, evil wizardry, arms ripped off, multiple decapitations, mud wrestling, a fight-to-the-death tournament and lots of hot ladies showing off the goods including Barbi Benton.
There were 3 sequels with the last one being in 1991 and I don't remember anything outstanding about any of them. There are also various movies which used scenes from this in them because that's how Corman rolls. The 2 BARBARIAN QUEEN films with Lana Clarkson are also kind of sequels to this except the character she plays has a different name. A remake of this was recently announced which is supposed to simply be titled BARBARIAN.
This Norwegian VHS gives us the title STALKER: THE WARRIOR KING and features a totally different character on the box cover!:
I had seen the first movie in this series, ENTRAILS OF A VIRGIN, a while back and recall it being alright. This follow up, which is not really a sequel, ramps things up in the absurdity category. It all starts out like a Yakuza film(a very rape-filled Yakuza film!) before unexpectedly(unless you had seen the first movie) morphing into a monster movie. I guess you could technically call this a rape/revenge flick but it's certainly not your standard example of that subgenre. You get a melty, gooey creature that kinda reminded me of The Toxic Avenger but only if ol' Toxie had a giant monster penis that resembles the Alien baby from ALIEN. A good one for lovers of weirdo Japanese gore flicks if they can manage to make it through the first half. AKA GUTS OF A VIRGIN 2 and GUTS OF A BEAUTY
Our poor rape victim commits suicide(but luckily turns into a watermelon before hitting the ground):
The first SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE is one of my very favorite stupid slasher movies of the 80s. This sequel successfully continues the tradition of being a fun dumb killer-on-the-loose-snuffing-out-teenagers flicks. In fact this one might be even dumber than the first movie with it's dancing rockabilly killer who seems to appear from main gal Courtney's(Crystal Bernard) nightmares(ala Freddy Kreuger). With his giant drill attached to a ridiculous-looking electric guitar there's no shortage of driller killing going on. There's also some real cheesy "rock" music, boobs, shitty cops, victims that you really want to see die, scenes that mimic music videos of the time and generally a good time to be had if you can appreciate 80s garbage cinema.
There is a Part 3 which came out 3 years later that I have never seen and a 2021 remake of the original that I can't imagine could top it in any way though I'm sure it's way more "diverse" which is the only thing that really mattered to filmmakers in 2021 anyway.
Not a blaxploitation flick but rather a very late entry trashy giallo movie about a nymphomaniac lady(Tini Cansino) who spices up her marriage by going to a weird Eurotrash whore house and maybe or maybe not killing various people. Very sex-filled and plays out like a softcore late-night Cinemax-type movie mixed with a bloody murder mystery. Filled with some ultra-80s fashions and some very hot ladies who are often naked this one is definitely a spicy and unique entry into any giallo marathon you might partake in. AKA BLACK ANGEL
This was the big highlight from a recent horror movie marathon I attended. Even though it was shot on video it looks light years better than your average American film shot the same way in this era and just looks like your typical TV program of the time. It also helps that it's only 54 minutes long since the story is not the most complex. We're dealing with demons here(based on some Japanese folklore?) that impregnate themselves inside humans and then violently, and gorily, burst out. From there it takes some very oddball unexpected turns as Japanese horror is sometimes wont to do. Maybe not for everyone but if you're a weirdo like me give it a look. Rubber monster effects by Tsuburaya Productions(responsible for ULTRA-MAN among other groovy Jap sci-fi things) really spice things up. AKA THE TASTY FLESH and GAKIDAMA
Giving birth to a Gakidama demon sure looks like a drag!:
Caught this one for the first time recently as part of a kung-fu/horror movie marathon and it was one of the big highlights. It starts of as your standard kung fu movie before entering into the world of the supernatural when our main character(Tien-Chi Cheng) makes a deal with the devil to get revenge with the help of the titular nine demons. These demons consist of a eight little kids and their mom(or maybe she's their babysitter? idk) who sometimes turn into plastic skulls and do dastardly things. Our hero, who now isn't acting all that heroic, also gets some sweet new glamtastic clothes to wreak havoc with. This is obviously a wacky interpretation of the legendary Faust story so you shouldn't expect much of a happy ending but it's a hell of a trip getting to the conclusion and one of my wacky favorites from former Shaw Brothers director Chang Cheh.
This giant-pig-on-the-loose-in-Australia epic is way more stylish than it has any right to be. This is obviously due to it's director Russell(HIGHLANDER) Mulcahy who started off being a music video director before embarking on his feature film journey. I've seen this compared to that wild Australian classic WAKE IN FRIGHT and while this might have some of the same energy as that it is clearly something made with a very 80s sensibility(especially with Duran Duran on the soundtrack). Check it out for something that's elevated above the average trashy JAWS-inspired animals-run-amok dreck.
Got a chance to catch this one in 3-D, the way God, intended recently. While it's a pretty by-the-numbers 80s slasher flick, 1. psycho escapes from asylum, 2. psycho kills sorority girls, 3. repeat, it was still fun to watch this in a theater full of enthusiastic horror fans so if you ever get a chance to see it presented this way give it a shot for some axe-flying action! I had previously, on two separate occasions, tried viewing this by myself and promptly fell fast asleep within the first few minutes, so I would not recommend that. As a bonus, the great Sydney Lassick, of course, steals every scene he's in as one of horror cinema's worst sheriffs.
I'd first heard this Spanish horror flick described as a mix of Mario Bava's RABID DOGS and TOMBS OF THE BLIND DEAD and while that's sorta true it's a bit more like the Bava movie mixed with a supernatural witch story and Lucio Fulci's THE BEYOND(which hadn't been released yet). It also predates SCANNERS with a crazy psychic head explosion. You get wacky pleather-coat-wearing bikers, a kid, dogs and an old lady getting offed, sex and exhibitionist masturbation in a church and some brief shuffling mummies which give you that BLIND DEAD feeling. An interesting smorgasbord of insane Eurotrash elements. If you don't find anything to like about this one you're probably lame. AKA FURTHER THAN FEAR
The Spanish poster rip-offs off the main figure in the poster for THE WITCH WHO CAME FROM THE SEA(which itself was ripped-off from a Frank Frazetta painting that was used as a cover for an issue of VAMPIRELLA magazine):
So this woman(Wong Lai Fun) gets possessed by the demon of her former life which seeks vengeance any anyone who wronged her in their past lives. We get to see how terrible it was in a long flashback scene to World War II complete with Japanese war atrocities including molestation, rape and murder of adults and children. Apparently according to this demon we're all responsible for everything every one of our past lives has done. What a drag! This movie is not a drag though because we get some classic gross category III moments including drinking from a dirty toilet bowl, castration by a crab, death by being turned into a toilet paper mummy, a disembowled(and eaten!) little girl, maggot munching and it all ends with a good ol' Buddhist exorcism. Probably the highlight of a recent all-day category II marathon I caught at the local weirdo arthouse theater.
I saw this one recently as the first movie in a whole marathon of category III films from Hong Kong. It starts off with a couple of guys stealing a brain from a mummy which apparently works like a magical genie in that it can grant the owner wishes. Unfortunately it also sorta works like that monkey's paw story because there are ultimately some bad consequences to your actions. There's a heavy-breathing killer brain, lots of goopy monster action towards the end which reminded me of THE INCREDIBLE MELTING MAN and Buddha with a swastika painted on his chest saves the day!
I do wish there was a better quality version of this available since I think I need glasses now after trying to decipher the blurry subtitles of this on a big screen.
