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A mad journey into the mind of the depraved!

A mad journey into the mind of the depraved!
Recommended for devolved primates only!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

CAPTAIN KRONOS: VAMPIRE HUNTER (1974)


 I put off seeing this movie for a long time. Not sure why. I guess it was my apprehension at watching another boring period-piece Hammer studios film about vampires. Well this one is sorta different. There's no Peter Cushing or Christopher Lee and it actually moves along pretty quickly for a Hammer flick. I kept thinking about how this was such a better version of BLADE(a movie that I detest for all it's shitty-CGI-ness stupidity). Caroline Munro is great as Kronos' main chick and there's a hunchback sidekick. Hunchback's make just about any horror movie just that much better. This fella kind of reminds me of Riff Raff from ROCKY HORROR for some reason. This was originally supposed to be a series and it's kinda sad that they never made another one due to the shitty reception this got at the time from the public. Maybe I'll actually go back and check out some other Hammer stuff even though some of it is as dull as watching a pretty painting for 2 hours.
My only question is why is that guy on my DVD cover? That's not Kronos at all!
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Bonus trailer!!:

Super cheesey 50's KRONOS:

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

BOARDING GATE (2007)

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Asia Argento and Michael Madsen talk a whole bunch in this one. Some other stuff happens but the action never gets exciting. I think the only reason to ever watch this is to see Asia in her underpants or less for many scenes. You would really have to be Asia Argento's biggest fan to appreciate this movie on any level. I am a pretty big fan of hers but I still wouldn't recommend this. I also blame Madsen for making yet another boring movie. It feels like forever until anything happens and it's not all that exciting when something does. Watch SCARLET DIVA or maybe THE HEART IS DECEITFUL... instead. Great boobs though!

The trailer ain't so great either!: