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A mad journey into the mind of the depraved!

A mad journey into the mind of the depraved!
Recommended for devolved primates only!

Tuesday, August 15, 2017

THE NEW KIDS (1985)


 Kinda weird to see Lori Loughlin as a high-school kid here since I really only know here as Aunt Becky on FULL HOUSE, which came just a couple of years later, but if you want to see Aunt Becky, and her brother(Shannon Presby as Loren, who not only has a girl's name in real life but also in this movie!!)), get brutalized, almost raped and almost burned alive by a gang of rednecks and then gets some sweet vengeance then this is the film for you. Director Sean Cunningham, best know for FRIDAY THE 13th, does a decent enough job here in what is basically a dramatic thriller with some very slight horror elements(mostly involving a pitbull who rips out necks) here and there. While it may have worked better for me as a full-on rape/revenge epic it's all a little too tame for that and the super-80s soundtrack can be quite grating at times it's still done well enough and all the actors, including Eric Stoltz and James Spader(as our main hillbilly psycho-bully) do a really good job with what they're given to do. As a bonus it ends with a very slasher-movie-esque stinger that sorta hints at a sequel that never happened.



                                                 The more boring U.S.A. poster:


                                                   AKA STRIKING BACK:

Sunday, August 13, 2017

THEATER OF BLOOD (1973)


 Vincent Price overacts his ass off in this tale of a Shakespearean actor who fakes his own suicide and then goes about getting bloody revenge on the critics who gave him scathing reviews throughout the years. He's assisted by his daughter, Diana Rigg(that lady from the old British AVENGERS program), who wears some ridiculously unconvincing disguises as she tries to pass for a man several times. His vengeance consists of using deaths from various Shakespeare and improvising a bit when necessary. You get a few quite gruesome moments for such a classy flick(classy because it was filmed in England where people seemed classier to me anyway) including decapitation, a dude stabbed to death by dirty bums and a guy's heart ripped out of his chest. I imagine this would have been one of Price's favorite roles to play because he gets to do so much over-the-top stuff here, including my favorite the super-gay, afro-wearing hair-stylist, so that's fun to watch. There's obviously some similarities with the plot to the DR. PHIBES films but I think I like those better since this one has a long runtime(almost 2 hours) and towards the end you certainly feel it. I've also seen this film, and PHIBES, blamed for the "torture-porn" crap like SAW that came years later but that's like comparing pizza to a pile of dog-shit. AKA THEATRE OF BLOOD(classy spelling!)

Thursday, August 10, 2017

NIGHT OF THE LEPUS (1972)



 The animal-run-amok genre reaches it's ridiculous zenith right here with this story of mutated giant rabbits that get a hankering for ripping folks(and horses!) apart with their big buck teeth. They do a good job, in the poster and trailer, of hiding the fact that the movie is actually about big killer bunnies by giving it this title that uses a term for rabbits that no one has used since ancient Rome. I guess the average film-goer in the 70s wouldn't waste their money on such a ridiculous premise but that really is the sole reason for checking this one out. I mean it's almost like they tried to find the cutest animal they could, outside of some kittens or puppies, and then try to make them seem ominous by adding some lion roars and and foaming mouths. They did give this one an all-star cast which includes PSYCHO shower-gal. Janet Leigh and Dr. McCoy from STAR TREK(DeForest Kelley) because even though this is obviously stupid idea for a movie everyone involved still gave it their all to pull it off as much as possible unlike something  more modern like SHARKNADO or MEGA SHARK VS. GIANT OCTOPUS which I have no idea why anyone would bother watching since the filmmakers can't even be bothered to attempt to make a real movie so why should I care?


       
       
  Germany and Austria weren't as careful in hiding what species the cuddly killers were:


Elvis Lepus double-feature!!:


Just as scary as a rattlesnake!!:



Monday, August 7, 2017

THE SEARCH FOR WENG WENG (2007)


 If you've been amazed by the antics of the world's smallest secret agent, Weng Weng, in films like FOR Y'UR HEIGHT ONLY and THE IMPOSSIBLE KID, then you owe it to yourself to check out this in-depth search into the true-life story behind this incredible little fellow. While I had been warned that Weng's experiences weren't all happiness and stardom I think the film does a good job of not being bogged down in the negativity and bitterness of his treatment and does a balanced job of showing how Weng should represent overcoming ridiculous odds to make something of yourself(or maybe in this case not to feel too exploited by greedy bastards that prey on the weak!). While most of the film works to shine light on some obscure film history (and Imelda Marcos' insanity!) it all ends on a very sentimental note.
 One of the saddest things to me, with no silver-lining, in this whole movie was finding out that a majority of crazy Filipino cinema has been lost to the ages due to shitty storage practices and general lack of interest. In fact it seems that most of Weng's films don't exist anymore which really makes those few that we can see even more cherished(at least by insane-cinema lovers like myself).


Sunday, August 6, 2017

SHE FREAK (1967)


 As a big fan of the weirdo 1930s film FREAKS it's hard not to also love this 1960s re-interpretation. The great David Friedman, who stopped collaborating with the great director HG Lewis a couple of years before this, wrote, produced, and even appears in, this tale of a poor desperate waitress who gets employed with the traveling(although they seem to only travel around one area of Florida where this was filmed) carnival/sideshow. The only problem is that she vehemently hates all the freaks who comprise the "freak show". You get a midget, snake-fondling, some burlesk(yes, they spell it that way!) strip-teasing, blood, a whole gaggle of monstrous-looking folks and, if you've seen FREAKS before, you know it all has to end with some good old-fashioned revenge and a quote from the bible about "vengeance is mine, sayeth the lord".
 While this movie is generously filled with padded/boring scenes of amusement park rides being assembled/disassembled that might put you to sleep the rest of the runtime is engaging enough for lovers of the weird side of cinema and for what's basically a remake they make it different enough from the original that it's not pointless unlike almost every remake made in the last 25 years.
 AKA ALLEY OF NIGHTMARES and FREAKS! There's also a recut version titled ASYLUM OF THE INSANE which apparently had some 3-D scenes added to it which sounds like a pretty awesome idea to me!




                                                   Every woman can be a She Freak!!!

On an amazing quadruple bill with an added "S"!!: