A princess gets captured by some bandits then one of her retarded servants ends up in a Shaolin temple learning kung fu to get her back. The bad guy uses the Falcon Claw and our hero learns Mantis style hence the title. Lots of comedy with dumb sound effects goes on and a good chunk of the movie is incomprehensible. AKA MANTIS VS. FALCON
Jackie Chan gets help from some ghost with bright red Raggedy Ann hair to get revenge for some nefarious deeds involving a Shaolin temple and other leaders of the kung fu world. As you would expect there are some goofy scenes involving Jackie in between the more serious bits. One memorable part has Jackie trying to write calligraphy with a giant pen as punishment for being such a screwup.
Quentin Tarantino ripped off the Ezekial 25:17 quote from the beginning of this movie like he rips off pretty much everything else he's ever done.
Yul Brynner stars in this Eurocrime thriller as an American hitman in Italy out to get revenge for his murdered brother while taking on the mob and the police. They also shoehorn a bit off an homage to THE MECHANIC with Brynner taking on a young apprentice(Massimo Ranieri) and showing him the ways of an assassin. Barbara Bouchet plays the lovely love interest and Martin Balsam plays the police chief. Car chases and gunplay are plentiful in this formulaic actioner. The version I watched of this seems to be missing a few minutes and is terribly panned and scanned though so perhaps I would give this a higher ranking if I could see an uncut/better-looking print.
Released on video as BLOOD RECKONING
While this is billed as a sequel to MASTER KILLER(THE 36th CHAMBER OF SHAOLIN) it's really not but is actually just another kung fu flick featuring Gordon Liu that involves him ending up in the Shaolin Temple learning kung fu to take revenge. This time out the revenge is for his brother and friends who work at a dye factory, get treated like shit, and get their asses kicked regularly for complaining, by their terrible bosses. It hits all the expected beats but doesn't ever come close to the original classic. AKA MASTER KILLER II and RETURN OF THE MASTER KILLER
There were quite a few similar roles for Liu and some unofficial sequels(this one here being the most legit just because it was actually made by The Shaw Brothers even if it doesn't follow the same character).
Lina Romay(billed as Candy Coster) has some nightmares involving, the transexual star of many sleazy Eurotrash films, Ajita Wilson and her 2 slaves. Director Jess Franco shows up as a retarded simpleton who informs Romay that the lady in her dreams is a long dead African Priestess but that doesn't stop her from showing up throughout the rest of the movie and seducing Romay and her mate. It's all very surrealistic and dreamlike. I introduced a friend of mine to the weird world Jess Franco cinema with this film during a recent marathon of his films at a local theater and it's probably not the best choice as it's truly a bizarre one that you should really work your way up to.
This is supposedly a remake of Francos' more well known VAMPYROS LESBOS, obviously swapping an evil African priestess for a lesbian vampiress. LESBOS itself was kind of a weird interpretation of the original DRACULA novel so it all goes back to Bram Stoker.
Victor Buono has always been one of my favorite character actors. From WHATEVER HAPPEND TO BABY JANE? to the 60s BATMAN TV series to that Eurotrash movie, THE MAD BUTCHER, where he kills people and turns them into sausages, he never fails to give an entertaining performance. This time he plays the title role of a pretty deranged fellow who enjoys strangling ladies in his spare time and playing with dolls. Supposedly based on/inspired by the case of The Boston Strangler(which was also the original working title) this is a pretty suspenseful trip with some echoes of PSYCHO thrown in, though the ending is a bit lackluster.
There was another Boston Strangler movie that came out 4 years after this starring Tony Curtis as the killer.
This is a pretty uneventful Eurotrash horror flick. I've seen it described as a giallo but it's really not. Rather than really being a mystery it's more of a case of some naughty Etruscan spirits killing off various people including John Saxon who has a pretty small role. Also dragging this down is the very low gore quotient since almost everyone gets killed by having their head turned quickly which is hardly the most exciting death sequence. Maybe the only highlights I found in this were the recycled soundtrack cues which borrowed from GATES OF HELL and NIGHT OF THE ZOMBIES and made me wish I was watching either one of those instead.
There is an earlier actual giallo, directed by the same director as this, Sergio Martino, called THE CASE OF THE SCORPION'S TAIL which looks way better. I need to check that out at some point.
I never knew there was another European movie about fucking corpses released in the 90s before catching this one as part of a Halloween horror movie marathon recently. Clearly influenced/ripped-off from the granddaddy off all corpse-boppin flicks the German NECROMANTIK films this Dutch entry doesn't quite live up to the grossness of it's predecessors but is still worth a look for sickos and miscreants into the weird. The plot concerns a lady who gets tied up by her lover who then proceeds to kick the bucket while in the act of humping and lay there all dead on her for a week. This leads to some serious mental issues for our leading lady. There's chainsaw hijinks, meathooks put to good use, a car chase and, of course, dead people diddling. The best part is that it's all wrapped up in an hour in case you're in a hurry.
It's kind of remarkable that this spoof of slasher movies came out in 1981 when those type of films were still being churned out in record numbers and the template had barely been set which would lead to them all becoming very predictable with set rules that they mostly all would follow. It's also kind of weird that they chose to not include much in the way of blood and no nudity since those are both such hallmarks of the slasher flick. It's all very dumb, of course, and will really only appeal to people who are into that AIRPLANE-type of absurd humor.
The character of Malvert The Janitor is really the stand out highlight for me and sadly the ridiculously lanky rubber-limbed actor, credited only as The Stick, only appeared in this one film before an early death took him from us.
Probably the only reason I stuck with this porn all the way through was to hear which 70s rock band they would steal songs from next for the soundtrack. It starts right off with some MC5 and then we get some of The Sweet before ending with a band I've never heard of before called Toe Fat. The plot is some kinda weird sleazy porn-watchers wish-fulfillment thing where the only character our orgasm-deprived main character, Velvet(Misty Regan, credited as Misty Middleton on the poster) can be satisfied by is a chubby, habitual sexual-harasser who pumps gas(played by porn director Carter Stevens who is sometimes mistakenly credited as being the director here). A tough one to get through but it does bring the rock. AKA SEXUAL STATES(an homage to ALTERED STATES?) and TEENAGE STRIPPERS
I was pretty disappointed that this didn't feature a literal "leech-woman" and instead featured a lady who goes around murdering men to drain their pineal gland which gives her temporary beauty and youth thanks to an African tribe that performed some voodoo ritual on her. I get that it's all a big metaphor for women's fear of aging but the film drags for quite a bit until we get to any murderous rampages. I'd probably choose THE WASP WOMAN over this for a similarly themed outing just because that one actually does have a monster.
