Thursday, September 15, 2016
THE TOXIC RETARDS (2015)
This movie was compiled by video camera footage taken by a retard so at least it has an excuse for being fucking awful. Calling this an actual movie is a bit of stretch since there's no real plot(there is some attempt to tell a story of aliens invading with really shithole fx but it's totally incomprehensible) or any solid narrative that I could make out. It's basically all just random unrelated scenes of director Carl Sukenick doing stuff(getting completely naked in one part!) or some girls(where the hell did he get these women from?? I'm gonna guess local prostitutes perhaps) that he musta coerced into getting naked somehow and long senseless monologues, oh and how could I forget the shitass gore scenes? For a schizophrenic mental-case ol' Carl at least seems to have some ambition. This movie is so bad and disjointed that it almost falls into the art film category. This is all completely unintentional of course but who am I to tell a retard what constitutes art. For someone with a lot of patience for bad editing looking to get into the mindset of a mentally handicapped man this might be interesting. For most of the rest of humanity this is totally unwatchable. I drank much beer to try and help me through the runtime(which seems really long at 75 minutes or so) and besides the one hilarious scene of Mr. Carl stripping himself down until he's butt-ass naked there was nothing to really hold my interest here.
Scenes of the aliens in this are taken from director Sukenick's 1991 video ALIEN BEASTS which I don't think I will ever be drunk enough to attempt viewing.