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A mad journey into the mind of the depraved!

A mad journey into the mind of the depraved!
Recommended for devolved primates only!

Saturday, November 26, 2016

NEVER TOO YOUNG TOO DIE (1986)


 Gene Simmons plays a hermaphrodite-villain named Velvet Von Ragner in this and his insane over-acting is really the only reason to sit through this. That is unless you are obsessed with Uncle Jesse(John Stamos) from FULL HOUSE and want to see him as a martial-arts(is gymnastics really a martial art?)-using action-hero avenging the death of his father(George Lazenby). Robert Englund shows up as an evil sidekick and Vanity acts sexy. It all moves along at a brisk enough pace but the stupidity(Stamos' Asian nerd friend builds a goofy bazooka and all the bad guys think they're in THE ROAD WARRIOR) and terrible music might be too much for those not obsessed with those wacky 80s movies(aka anyone older than their 30s).


Known in France as STARGROVE AND DANJA:

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