Saturday, February 13, 2010
ZOMBIE 5: KILLING BIRDS (1987)
A couple of gory scenes are all that one can recommend from this bottom of the list Euro-zombie crapfest. First rule of spaghetti zombie movies should be that you have to include more than 1 or 2 zombies that only appear intermittently. Second rule is the story doesn't really matter cram your movie full of action and gore and everyone who likes these kind of movies will be happy. This movie tries to tell a very muddled story about this Vietnam vet getting revenge on his wife for screwing around and somehow turning her and the rest of his family all into zombies with the help of a bunch of birds who for some reason pluck the crazy vets eyes out or something like that. The problem is, as you can tell by that description, is that nothing really makes any sense and the more they try to tell a story the more stupid it becomes. Rule number 3 if your gonna make a stupid movie go for it. Go balls out and make it as dumb as you can. Then at least we can all get a few good laughs. The worst thing about this movie is of course the fact that it's a challenge to stay awake through most of the boring talky senseless parts which make up the majority of the movie. If you just want some gore watch the first few minutes for the murders then fast forward about 60-70 minutes until a couple of zombies show up and some dumb Italians in ugly 80's clothes get killed in ridiculous ways.