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A mad journey into the mind of the depraved!

A mad journey into the mind of the depraved!
Recommended for devolved primates only!

Sunday, September 18, 2011

HARD TICKET TO HAWAII (1987)

"One man's dream is another man's lunch"

Tons of topless beauties standing around in model poses and as an afterthought there's a story about diamond smuggling gangsters or something like that. As a bonus you also get a large puppety-looking killer snake on the loose, a transvestite spy character, sumo wrestlers and some awkward kung fu thrown in. Also gratuitous use of a grenade launcher and unnecessary violence towards a blow-up sex doll.  The boat from director Andy Sidaris' MALIBU EXPRESS shows up and this is supposed to be a sequel to that flick although you get no appearance from Sybil Danning's tits which is disappointing and only a fleeting reference to the events in the first movie.  There's also a horrific theme song which you get to hear in full as the director shows off the plane he rented in a long music video sequence.  Sidaris' movies although really stupid and filled with equally dumb characters who make bad jokes are all filmed really well with that slick direct to cable TV look and I can see why this guys movies became staples of late-night sleaze programming for a few years as they're really fun disposable garbage entertainment filled with former Playboy playmates.  Also the snake scenes are more enjoyable than anything in that shitty cgi-filled ANACONDA movie.  I especially enjoyed the old snake in the toilet gag.


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