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A mad journey into the mind of the depraved!

A mad journey into the mind of the depraved!
Recommended for devolved primates only!

Saturday, March 17, 2018

LOVE CAMP (1981)

 The idea of a cult of naked, hump-crazy hippies that worship Laura Gemser as a divine goddess seems like something I must have dreamed a few times in the past. Little did I know there was an actual film which put my dreams down for posterity. The plot here, what little of it there actually is, is obviously a take-off on the whole Jim Jones Jonestown massacre but with a way sexier outcome. There's a lot of things to love about this one besides just worshipping the Black Emanuelle though including Tanga, Gemser's constantly flexing-for-the-camera henchman who dispatches of those who dare leave this cult of love and mandatory orgies, a bunch of clunky 80s disco, a blonde head hippie fellow(Christian Anders) who prances around like a stoned John Philip Law and of course tons of naked flesh. A goofy sexploitation ride that's a new favorite up there towards the top of the Black Emanuelle series pile probably just under EMANUELLE IN AMERICA and EMANUELLE AND THE LAST CANNIBALS for me. AKA DIVINE EMANUELLE: LOVE CULT

Black Emanuelle series:

THE REAL EMANUELLE (1974) Obviously made before the first Black Emanuelle film but retitled for it's English release to be part of the series later on.
BLACK EMANUELLE 2 (1976) The one film without Gemser
EMANUELLE'S PERVERSE OUTBURST (1983) Stock-footage filled

There's probably more than this thanks to various retitlings.

Thursday, March 15, 2018


 Annette Funicello was America's sweetheart and beloved by all, thanks to all those BEACH PARTY movies, when she starred in this. With that in mind I found this a strange role for her since her character steals a guy(fellow 60s popstar Fabian) away from his girlfriend(Diane McBain) and comes off as a pretty big jerk. Thankfully that's not the main plot point here though and it's pretty hard to stay mad at Annette. The main drama concerns Fabian, as stock car driver Tommy Callahan, and his quest to getting back into the racing game after proving he's a nutjob who blacks out during races and murders guys with his car. You would think after sending a fellow driver to his fiery death that might be enough for Tommy to call it quits but I guess with the power of positive thinking and Annette by your side anything is possible. While I didn't care too much about the racing scenes everything moves along briskly enough and you get a raucous party with beer poured over heads, gymnastics and 60s go-go stripping! A goofy fun enough watch that is basically a slightly toned-down version of one of the BEACH PARTY movies on wheels.

Tuesday, March 13, 2018


 Before the 1980s came along and Bronson got lazy and also typecast into playing just one role over and over again in every movie he was able to stretch his acting ability a bit. This time out he plays the old west gunfighter Wild Bill Hickok. While Hickok was a real person this film takes him on a fictional quest to hunt down the bigass beast of the title. Along the way he runs into "Chief"(Will Sampson) from ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST who's out for revenge against the monster buffalo who stampeded over his kid. The film plays like a monster movie wedged into a western which gives it a unique feel and you almost get a JAWS-vibe here and there due to the similarity in battling a giant mechanical menace. Good example of a decent Hollywood-flick before Hollywood turned into a giant cesspool.

Monday, March 12, 2018

J.D.'S REVENGE (1976)

 Watching this blaxploitation classic in 2018 the one thing that stood out to me the most is when our main character confides in his best friend about how he beat the crap out of his girlfriend and his buddy tells him that she will come back to him because sometimes women just need to be smacked around a bit. Talk about different times! The main focus here is not about abusing women though it's about this law student(Glynn Turman) who gets possessed by a vengeful spirit who seeks revenge on a young-ish Louis Gossett(before he started calling himself Jr. I guess) and his brother. It fits into the blaxploitation, revenge and horror genres which makes for an interesting mix. I've seen some reviews put down the acting in this but I thought it was all done surprisingly well especially the lead role which has our protagonist convincingly turn from a sweet young man to a raging razor-wielding asshole sometimes within the same scene. An interesting entry in 70s black cinema which, to me, the only downfall was the soundtrack being fairly bland.

                                           "A mean double-bill!":

Saturday, March 10, 2018


 I've never seen the first BLACK EMANUELLE movie, which starred Laura Gemser, but it doesn't seem to really matter much since this doesn't seem like a real sequel. Also they switch Black Emanuelle's on us here and give us someone with the unruly name of Shulamith Lasri(crowned in the English version with the notably more Americanized name of Sharon Lesley) in the title role. This would turn out to be Miss Lasri's only film role and while she does seem more black than Gemser I'm a loyal fan of the real Black Emanuelle and find her much more entertaining to watch. This movie is a weird softcore sex flick. Weird mostly because it focuses on Emanuelle's mental problems that stem from her brother's murder and her near rape and not so much on anything all that sexy. There is one fellow who likes to hang anchors off his erect schlong to show off which I found amusing. Apart from that and lots of bare breasts, including the lovely blonde giallo-regular Dagmar Lassander, there's lots of psychological mumbo-jumbo and a plot that doesn't seem to ever go anywhere up until the very end. It does have an amusingly wonky soundtrack but it's probably safe to skip this one and stick with the original Gemser BLACK EMANUELLE sex epics for more titillating thrills. AKA THE NEW BLACK EMANUELLE

Dubbed version which strangely enough has a couple of extra sex scenes not in the Italian print:


Thursday, March 8, 2018


 I coulda sworn I'd seen this one before somewhere over the years but after giving it a watch last night I realized I had only ever seen the sequel, CLEOPATRA JONES AND THE CASINO OF GOLD, numerous times before. This one is a bit of an improvement as it seems to have a bigger budget and while we don't have Mr. Roper(Norman Fell) here, as in Part 2, we do get a whole slew of other big-name stars including Huggy Bear(Antonio Fargas),  Dr. Black(Bernie Casey), Mama Evans from GOOD TIMES(Esther Rolle) and of course Cleopatra's arch-nemesis Shelley Winters as the evil drug lord Mommy. With a script written by THE MACK(Max Julien) himself it's a pretty simple action-filled blaxploitation spectacle where  drug-pushers, pimps and racist cops are punished equally by our extra-tall martial-arts proficient hero. Also while chopsockeying bad-guys she makes some similar sounds as BLACK BELT JONES so perhaps they were related. Tamara Dobson as Miss Jones cuts a sorta strange figure for a believeable ass-kicking character. I mean she's definitely got the height advantage on almost everyone but she seems more like a groovy model(what with the changing of her ultra-fashionable wardrobe almost every scene) than someone who's been in many brawls, but what do I know? The only other questionable thing is the PG-rating which seems to keep things from getting very raunchy and keeping it firmly in the mainstream sensibility of the times. This was popular enough though to enough folks that the sequel(produced by one of the Shaw Brothers!) was released 2 years later. Also it has a pretty sweet soundtrack as is usually the case with any blaxploitation from this era.

                                     Known in France as DYNAMITE JONES!:

Tuesday, March 6, 2018


 This is a Ralph Bakshi directed and animated film that I knew nothing about until finding it the other day on an old VHS tape. Being a big fan of Baski's 70s output I had some high expectations going in. Sadly they weren't all met. Not to say that this is terrible, the animation, as usual, is top-notch and quite trippy and the idea of the film is cool. The main problem for me was the music used. Even though the film is set in the 50s everytime some tune from the soundtrack played the audience is abruptly reminded that the film was made in the 80s and that's a bit jarring. Also the story is kind of a mess with some pretty appealing characters that are hard to latch onto. Even our cool Fonzie-like hero turns out to be a cowardly wuss by the end. While this may be some deep comment on the nature of humanity it doesn't exactly make for a compelling viewing experience. I suppose this one is for Bakshi-completists only or people that don;t mind their fake 50s cartoons being extra fake.
 The history of the making of this film seems more interesting than the final product. Apparently it was started way back in 1974 as a mix of live-action and animation. That version, which allegedly included some footage of The New York Dolls performing, was completed in the late 70s but Warner Bros. didn't care for it and made Bakshi go back and animate all the live-action parts which took him up to '82 to finish. The original live-action mix doesn't seem to exist anymore which is a shame since it seems like it would at least have been interesting to check out as some kinda proto-WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT? but made for adults.


Monday, February 19, 2018

THE BEING (1983)

 I know I had seen this tale of a melty, radioactive, ALIEN-esque creature at least once before but I'll be damned if I could remember any of it even while re-watching it recently. That is a bit weird because it has such a crazy hodge-podge of a cast including Martin Landau as a scientist, Jose Ferrer as the mayor and disgruntled alcoholic husband of Ruth Buzzi(from 60s T.V.'s LAUGH-IN), The Unknown Comic without his mask on and fellow comedian Kinky Friedman as bumbling Idaho-hicks. Also it's directed by Jackie Kong whose other big film BLOOD DINER I have an irrational love for. In this one, despite there being a handful of comedy pros that appear, there's nothing very comedic that happens. This is not necessarily a bad thing since, god knows, there are more than enough silly 80s attempts at horror movies(for example every NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET movie). What you do get is  a pretty straight-ahead monster-on-the-loose epic where a young boy gets his head ripped off, some drive-in patrons get snatched and offed by our one eyed mutated freak who can seemingly melt and reassemble himself when the situation calls for it and a backstory that I wasn't too clear on concerning a ladies(old-timey actress Dorothy Malone) little boy becoming the monster. While this isn't the worst I can't help but think this needs a couple of those insane wacky touches that Kong put into BLOOD DINER to make this one stand-out more from the rest of the more standard 80s creature features. AKA EASTER SUNDAY, FREAK, BEAUTY AND THE BEAST and THE POTTSVILLE HORROR

Sunday, February 18, 2018


 I'd never heard of this one until a friend introduced me to it recently and it's rapidly become one of my new favorites. It's a pretty simple plot concerning two drug-dealing no-goodniks who run afoul of the law and fulfill the promise of the title. The plot is not the main attraction here though, at least not to me, I found the oddball touches way more interesting. First off our duo runs into a seemingly retarded ice-cream man in one of the strangest cinematic moments I've viewed in a while, then shoot there way through the rest of the movie bickering and picking up some female companionship along the way. Finally it all ends up in a weirdo hippie drug-dealers house where cocaine and threesomes are flowing. The most surprising thing to me about the film is that it's a grimy 70s experience full of degenerates where no actual rapes happen. Women are not treated very nice anyway though and it does come close at times but that was something that definitely stood out. The other big surprise is the amount of blood that flows. For an early 70s action/thriller movie it's quite heavy on the red sauce(makeup fx by a young Rick Raker obviously account for this). Overall I'd call this a great downer 70s flick that's worth checking out for fans of LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT and films of that ilk.


 Bottom of the barrell, cheapjack KING KONG rip-off. Not only do we get a giant gorilla(which is just a guy in a gorilla suit that might be one of the worst gorilla suits ever, complete with bugged out eyes that don't blink or move at all and would seem more at home on a dollar store toy!)
 but also a giant tyrannosaurus-rex(which is a guy in a very crappy dinosaur suit that I think in certain shots is actually just a dollar store toy!). So we do get some giant monster fighting with some not very special-FX. There is an actual stop-motion sea-serpent monster that shows up briefly towards the end that I was a little shocked to see(apparently this footage was taken from an earlier swords n' sandals flick called GOLIATH AND THE DRAGON). In between the monster "action" there's some pretty dull jungle frolicking. You would be way better off watching THE MIGHT PEKING MAN than this for KONG-inspired goodness. AKA ATTACK OF THE DEATH MONSTERS
 The T-Rex costume was recycled for ONE MILLION AC/DC which is a prehistoric/sexploitation mash-up.

In Mexico he was an invincible gorilla!:

On a Texas double-feature with one of the first bigfoot movies!:

This looks like it was a fun double-bill goofy monster-party!:

Triple-feature with a Lon Chaney/John Carradine anthology film(AKA GALLERY OF HORROR) and SPIDER BABY under an alternate title:

Tuesday, February 13, 2018


 Not to be confused with the Stephen King adaptation that would come out a couple of years later this film has nothing to do with King and deals with a vampire cab-driver who bites occasional female passengers. Apparently they have to be either suicidal, dying from some unnamed disease or otherwise near death for him to put the bite on them. While this film does have a lot of nudity and sexual situations going for it, thanks to the romantic/sexy bloodsucker-vibe going on, that's kinda all it really has as it becomes quite a drudge in the way it was shot. Everything seems to take forever in between one sexy neck-biting to the next. It's also filmed in a super stylized way that may have seemed more impressive back in the MTV-influenced 80s but now just seems super dated and unnecessary but if you dig very 80s hunky vamps I guess give it a chance or just go watch THE LOST BOYS instead. AKA CENTRAL PARK DRIFTER(which is kind of a stupid name since this was filmed in Canada and Central Park is in New York but I guess Toronto has parks also)

Known in France as CENTRAL PARK DRIVER:


Sunday, February 11, 2018


 While Hammer studios' HORROR OF DRACULA and THE CURSE OF FRANKENSTEIN were great and kicked off the resurgence in monster movies in the late 50s my personal favorite is this Oliver Reed-starring wolfman saga. The reinvention of the whole werewolf mythos(based on a 1930s novel) is pretty refreshing and Reed does a great job with imbuing the suffering monster with some expected pathos. While the transformation scenes are nothing amazing and were done better in the 30s the monster itself is pretty impressive-looking.  The whole film also has a great fairy-tale-feeling to it and with the always amazing setpieces that Hammer used really stands out as a special classic horror film. While I wouldn't put this above the Chaney WOLFMAN it's a pretty close second and one of my favorites form Hammer studios line of monster films.

                                                          French poster!:

Italian poster!(except for the U.S. it looks like they tried to hide what the monster looked like):

                                 On a double-bill with a Hammer film I've never seen:

                                            Inspiration for some great artwork!:

RED WOLF (1995)

 Apparently this is a Hong Kong rip-off of the 1992 Steven Seagal film UNDER SIEGE about terrorists on a boat. Not being a big Seagal fan and having never seen any of his big films I'll have to assume that's the case. That being said this seemed fresh enough to me for an all-out action-fest kung fu flick. Star Kenny Ho pretty much spends the whole film kicking multi-racial terrorist ass with the help of the stylish direction of Yuen Woo-Ping who goes way back to the 60s and has done stunt work/coordination for about a billion classic martial-arts extravaganzas. Leading lady Christy Chung, while not as great with the fighting skills, plays a sympathetic enough part as the bad girl trying to do the right thing and she even gets to put on a blonde wig and mock Madonna in a delightful scene. There's some clunky dialogue, especially in the dubbed version, but I think this is a good one to watch just for the excellent fighting if that's your bag.


A loving tribute!: https://www.instagram.com/p/BfA9AKfFTWa/