HOLLYWOOD MEATCLEAVER MASSACRE (1976)

  You would think a movie most commonly known simply as MEATCLEAVER MASSACRE might actually contain someone getting killed with a meat-cleaver but don't count on that. There is a massacre though consisting of strangulation, bludgeoning and a kitchen knife, but no cleaver action, which sets the story into motion and then we focus on the sole survivor of said massacre getting his revenge from his hospital bed which kinda reminded me of that movie PATRICK(which wouldn't come out for a couple of years) though in this case he uses some kinda Satanic demon conjuring instead of just psychic powers like in that one. It's not very exciting. Christopher Lee pops up in the opening and closing to tell stories that vaguely relate to the main movie. Apparently the producers just bought some footage of him to get his mug on the poster.

 Released on video as REVENGE OF THE DEAD. 

SLAUGHTERHOUSE ROCK (1987)

 

 By the late 80s slasher movies had become a bit passé. The new hip thing was ripping off A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET and that's what we get here. Movies with this type of dream logic where things happen with very little  logical explanation are never my favorites. I have this on a double feature Blu Ray with HARD ROCK ZOMBIES so I thought because of that, and the title, that this would be a more rocking affair than it is. It's really more in the vein of something like SPOOIKIES than HARD ROCK ZOMBIES. We do get a soundtrack by DEVO's Mark Mothersbaugh which is pretty decent but not much in the plot really lives up to the ROCK moniker. Toni Basil, of "Hey Mickey" fame, shows up as a ghost and the whole idea of people who get killed reappearing as ghosts complaining to our main character is stolen from AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON.  Not the worst 80s horror out there but still a bit of a disappointment. 

                                             Known in Mexico as SATANIC SPIRIT!:

VAMPIRE BUSTER (1989)

 Not really a vampire movie but more of a demon situation. You see this demon lost a fight a long time ago and got itself trapped in a vase which ends up getting tossed around in a comedic fashion. Most of this movie is in fact a comedy and not very horrific so if that's your thing this might be for you. 

 The DVD I have of this calls it NINJA VAMPIRE BUSTERS and since this is also not a ninja movie I have to reduce even more points for that! AKA GHOST CATCHING MASTER(the only accurate title!)

Communist wackos lead to demonic hijinks. Sounds about right:

British video box!:

THE RAPE AFTER (1984)

 AKA DEVIL FETUS 2 and just like the first movie this deals with a woman being raped by a demon and having a monster baby. This one might make slightly more sense then the first one but that's not saying a whole lot. The characters, besides our unfortunate demon mommy and her insane mom who keeps her dead dad's(who she murdered!) rotting body in a closet, include a sleazy photographer(who's pretty much to blame for everything supernatural that happens) and his new wife. The gore flows copiously and this is another entertainingly wacky category III horror flick.

 

                                                                 On glorious VHS!:

DEMON WITHIN (1985)

  This was the big highlight from a recent horror movie marathon I attended. Even though it was shot on video it looks light years better than your average American film shot the same way in this era and just looks like your typical TV program of the time. It also helps that it's only 54 minutes long since the story is not the most complex. We're dealing with demons here(based on some Japanese folklore?) that impregnate themselves inside humans and then violently, and gorily, burst out. From there it takes some very oddball unexpected turns as Japanese horror is sometimes wont to do. Maybe not for everyone but if you're a weirdo like me give it a look. Rubber monster effects by Tsuburaya Productions(responsible for ULTRA-MAN among other groovy Jap sci-fi things) really spice things up. AKA THE TASTY FLESH and GAKIDAMA

                Giving birth to a Gakidama demon sure looks like a drag!:

DEAD AND BREAKFAST (2004)

  This is one of those dreaded horror/comedy mash-ups that all the cool kids love. I guess we can blame THE EVIL DEAD franchise for that. This one comes complete with terrible rockabilly songs, terrible rap songs, a retarded dancing zombies(I guess technically they're demons but they sure act a lot like zombies) sequence. Some of the actors here went on to do other notable things but the only one I really recognize is Jeffrey Dean Morgen as the sheriff who went on to be Negan in THE WALKING DEAD series. David Carradine shows up for a quick paycheck and Anthony Perkin's son Oz ends up becoming zombified/demonized and plays the main baddie from there on out. On the plus side there's quite a bit of gore in between the stupidity. I probably wouldn't have ever bothered with this if it wasn't part of a recent movie night gathering with some friends. 

FROSTBITER: WRATH OF THE WENDIGO (1995)

  I'm certainly no audio engineer, but I'm pretty sure when you put music in your movie you don't want it to be so fucking loud that it drowns out what every character is saying! What I could make out plotwise, between blaring songs, is that a demon(or multiple demons) is on the loose because some dipshit redneck kills the old dude responsible for keeping this evil force in check. So we get some decent gore, a hand gets chomped off by a chili monster, there's some claymation creatures and it's kind of a cool novelty to see one of the founding members of seminal proto-punk band THE STOOGES. The problem is that it's all done so overly dumb and comedic that it feels like just another stupid TROMA movie(which just so happens to be the production company that was responsible for this). So if stupid TROMA crap is your bag give this a look. If your typical TROMA movie annoys you after 5 minutes, as it usually does me, then stay away! AKA WENDIGO

Known in Japan as ANOTHER EVIL DEAD CHAPTER: FROSTBITER which is fairly accurate!

THE MANITOU (1978)

  So this lady(Susan Strasberg) has a growth on the back of her neck and it turns out to be a Native American demon seeking revenge on whitey. Thanks to some help from Tony Curtis and an Indian medicine man(played by Michael Ansara in some red-face makeup) they do battle. This includes STAR WARS lasers and Satan himself showing up. Goofy but enjoyable mess of a film that is sort of an  EXORCIST-rip-off but unique enough to stand apart from most of those. 

 This had to be director William Girdler's biggest film given the FX work and stars involved(Burgess Meredith and Stella Stevens also show up briefly). This would sadly be his last film before dying in a helicopter crash. 

                           Known in Germany as SUPER ZOMBIE: THE BIRTH OF HORROR!:

TALES FROM THE CRYPT: DEMON KNIGHT (1995)

  Well I avoided seeing this thing until a recent movie night gathering of friends. As anyone with half a brain knows the 90s were some terrible times for horror cinema. Specifically American horror cinema, since the rest of the world hadn't received the memo yet that everything even slightly scary had to be a comedy disguised as a horror film. This one starts out with a puppet introducing a story about demons. I think I'll stick with the real DEMONS from Italy for maximum gore and minimal cartoonish hi-jinks. For added annoyance the director felt the need to tilt the camera on an angle for a bunch of shots so you can feel like a confused dog while viewing. Thanks Ernest Dickerson. To be fair though he did throw in some boobs in a nice scene with the legendary Dick Miller and he previously did direct that ridiculous remake of THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME  with Ice-T that I remember enjoying at the local drive-in back when it premiered, so I guess I can forgive him. 

 There was a follow-up to this the next year titled BORDELLO OF BLOOD with Dennis Miller which looks terrible and the original TALES FROM THE CRYPT film in 1972 by Amicus studios back when they still made horror movies for non-retards. 

THE DEMON LOVER (1976)

  This one is a pretty chaotic mess of a 70s horror flick. The messy part might be due to only seeing this in the crappy blur-o-vision version that's currently streaming online. Obviously this is due for one of those fancy digitally-remastered upgrades that all the kids love. 

 The plot concerns a long-haired occultist dude( a fellow by the oddball name of Christmas Robbins!) trying to raise a demon with the help of his hippie friends. These friends include a little hobbit of a man with a strange munchkin-like voice for added hilarity. When they have a falling out everyone starts getting bumped off by a big hairy extremely fake-looking demon who looks like he might have escaped from the set of H.R. Puffnstuff. You get some bloody kills, a guy, who looks like Frank Zappa, gets shot in the dick with a crossbow, stabbings ensue and it looks like lots of clothes got stained in the process. Gunnar Hansen shows up for a little bit as a professor to talk about good and bad cults.

 There's apparently a longer, more complete cut of this on VHS as THE DEVIL MASTER which I have not seen yet. Other video release titles include DEMON MASTER, DEMON TOWER, MASTER OF EVIL and COVEN

                                       A little slice of demonic weirdness!:

                                   Clearly inspired by this classic tune!:

 

DEMONS 2 (1986)

 Like many sequels this one, by the same director(Lamberto Bava), is just a crappier version of the first movie. It replaces the cool theatrical setting with an apartment building that our demons get to run amuck in. Asia Argento makes her film debut at 11 years old, a monster from GHOULIES shows up at one point for no reason and not much of what happens makes  a whole lot of sense. It's still the best of the DEMONS sequels and that's mostly due to the great Bobby Rhodes returning, except instead of playing a pimp this time he's a personal trainer which is not quite as cool. The blood and gore is present but not in as copious amounts as DEMONS. If you're really into the original though I'm sure you've at least seen this one and it's a good place to stop with the sequels.

NIGHT OF THE DEMONS (1988)

  I have avoided watching this one for 20 years now because it just looked like another stupid 80s comedy-horror flick and turns out I was correct. On the positive side you get to ogle Linnea Quigley's ass for a while at the beginning but from there on it's just cliched 80s stereotypes(dumb Italian guy, quirky black dude, "good girl", jock etc.) trapped in a haunted(or demonic I guess) house. There is one disgusting, fat punk rocker fellow named The Stooge who is at least a bit unique for the times(though even he just seems to be doing an imitation of an annoying Bill Paxton character most of the time). At least they used real fx(including the memorable lipstick in Linnea's nipple trick for no apparent reason bit) and If you were a kid weened on cartoons in the 1980s then this will probably be way more entertaining to you. I think I will stick with THE EVIL DEAD for what's basically the same movie done a lot better and with some real gore. AKA HALLOWEEN PARTY
 There were two sequels to this(part III being some 90s shot-on-video crap) but I don't think that even fans of this first one are into those.


  

NIGHTMARE SISTERS (1988)

 The first half hour or so of this is really talky and dumb but then our three main ladies, Linnea Quigley, Michelle Bauer(credited as Michelle McClellan) and Brinke Stevens, become possessed by a demonic succubus and become naked and horny. This leads to prolonged scenes of bubble bath taking, molesting food and humping stuff. It also leads to growing fangs and biting guys' genitals since this is a horror film(or at least a comedy disguised as a horror film). It does remain consistently stupid throughout but if you don't mind ample nakedness and lame jokes it's a fun harmless movie to watch on a Sunday morning to chase away a hangover.  Also they manage to use a pretty punk rock-ish soundtrack which is nice. Quigley also gets to perform a punk music video and has a throwaway line that references her most well-known film RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD.
AKA SORORITY SUCCUBUS SISTERS

THE MASK OF THE DEMON (1989)

 I've seen a few people refer to this as Lamberto Bava's remake of his father's BLACK SUNDAY(a.k.a. THE MASK OF SATAN) but after watching it I think it's definitely more in the crappy rip-off department. The only thing that it takes from Mario Bava's film is the whole mask with the spikes in it thing and a witch who comes back and gets revenge. It also goes under the alternate title BLACK SUNDAY which is pretty ballsy for such a shitty imitation. The majority of the plot varies greatly from the original SUNDAY film though and is unfortunately way less stylish and iconic. Also we have no one here that is anywhere near the great Barbara Steele so they let a guy be the lead and he seems like an extremely dumb fellow throughout.  
 The movie starts of with a bunch of nitwit skiers who end up trapped in an ice-cave where they unleash some evil forces. Pretty quickly things stop making sense until we devolve into one of those- "was it a dream or did it really happen"-types of stories, and I hate those! Needless to say this was not a fun watch. Perhaps the fact that it was originally made for Spanish TV may have been a big reason. For a TV movie though it does feature a bit of nudity and gore which I doubt you would see in anything made for TV here in America.
 This one is also alternately known as DEMONS 5:THE DEVIL'S VEIL which kind of makes sense since our group do sorta resemble the monsters from DEMONS and all the DEMONS sequels I've seen(besides part 2) are terrible!