THE SAVAGE ISLAND (1980)

  Probably best known as ANTHROPOPHAGUS(but I first saw it as THE GRIM REAPER back in the VHS days, sadly that's the most edited version missing the 2 big shock bits) this is the gory tale of a sorta zombie-like cannibalistic monster running around a Greek island slashing up and chomping down on a group of folks including Mia Farrow's little sister Tisa. George Eastman plays the maniacal creature, and at 6'9" is the perfect imposing figure for such a role. There are a few lulls in the action after the meat-cleaver-to-the-head opening but it more than makes up for that with all the absurdly gory scenes to follow. There's fetus-munching, scalping, neck biting, a severed head in a bucket and plenty of stabbings to go around. It's all topped off when our seemingly decomposing villian gets his guts spilled and decides he's gonna chow down on them. Definitely an all-time video-nasty classic memory! AKA THE ZOMBIE'S RAGE and known in England as THE BEAST.

Known in Germany as MAN-EATER!:

Known in Spain as GOMIA, TERROR IN THE AEGEAN SEA!:

THE NIGHTMARE NEVER ENDS (1980)

  Beeing a big fan of wacko 80s anthology flick NIGHT TRAIN TO TERROR I feel it's my duty to check out the source material that they used to construct that film. This film, starring NIGHT COURT's Richard Moll and B-movie fav Cameron Mitchell, makes up the last segment of NTTT except in that version someone added a bunch of claymation that isn't here. You do get an overly smug Satan character vs. a bunch of obviously ineffectual heros, Nazis, a fairly gory climax on an operating table and most importantly Cameron Mitchell dancing to power pop in a disco after getting slipped a Mickey by the Devil. It's all kind of pointless though and sorta plays like a shitty version of THE SENTINEL. 

 There are various edits of this under different titles including SATAN'S SUPPER(allegedly the shortest cut), SHIVER and CATACLYSM.

                                      Pretty cool homemade trailer!:

FROSTBITER: WRATH OF THE WENDIGO (1995)

  I'm certainly no audio engineer, but I'm pretty sure when you put music in your movie you don't want it to be so fucking loud that it drowns out what every character is saying! What I could make out plotwise, between blaring songs, is that a demon(or multiple demons) is on the loose because some dipshit redneck kills the old dude responsible for keeping this evil force in check. So we get some decent gore, a hand gets chomped off by a chili monster, there's some claymation creatures and it's kind of a cool novelty to see one of the founding members of seminal proto-punk band THE STOOGES. The problem is that it's all done so overly dumb and comedic that it feels like just another stupid TROMA movie(which just so happens to be the production company that was responsible for this). So if stupid TROMA crap is your bag give this a look. If your typical TROMA movie annoys you after 5 minutes, as it usually does me, then stay away! AKA WENDIGO

Known in Japan as ANOTHER EVIL DEAD CHAPTER: FROSTBITER which is fairly accurate!

PLEASE DON'T EAT THE BABIES (1983)

  While this 80s trash flick certainly has a memorable title that's kinda the best thing about it. The title is also a bit nonsensical since there aren't any babies at all but there is some flesh-munching depending on which cut you view of this. I was lucky? enough to get to see the full 101-minute experience which cuts back and forth between various edits(one of which is titled ISLAND FURY). In one version there are actually large insects that devour people that apparently some numb-skull edited out of their cannibal family on an island plot in other versions. The main problem with this flick though isn't a lack of killer bugs but really a lack of anything all that gory(outside of one guy chomping down on a lady) or compelling. For a lot of the runtime it plays out like an 80s action movie without the action scenes. I think the main appeal of this lies in the fact that it's so obscure and not much else. 

 Another off-putting aspect of this is that it feels like 2 different movies that were edited together and that's sorta true since the orignal portions of the film were shot in 1982 and then the wraparound story, that takes place years later, were shot 6 years later to complete it.    

 

THANK YOU, MR. MOTO (1937)

  This is the 2nd film in the MR. MOTO series satrring Peter Lorre. It's really neat to see Lorre kicking ass in these movies throwing people around like ragdolls using judo and outwitting everyone. Of course it's his stunt-double doing all the heavy lifting here.  The majority of this movie is, as usual not really action but more mystery hijinks as Moto takes on some gangster treasure hunters. This might be the least comedic of the Moto films and quite a few people actually end up getting killed before Moto saves the day. Might be my fav out of the series but they do all kinda blend together. 

BLOOD ON MY SHOES (1983)

 

 Spoiler-alert!: The shocking plot-twist here is that star Lina Romay doesn't actually get naked and screw everyone unlike most other Jess Franco-directed epics featuring her. This one deals more with Romay's comedic hijinks and a group of spies doing spy stuff. Howard Vernon plays a crazy old man and Franco himself pops up briefly. Miss Lina does wear some revealing and see-through outfits numerous times throughout so if the tease is more of a turn-onto you than the reveal give it a pervy look.

 The movie poster up there is a take-off of the one used for GATOR which is weird since that came out 7 years earlier and is a very different typ of movie. 

                                  Lina being silly in a too-small top!:

BEWARE: CHILDREN AT PLAY (1989)

  I guess there are 2 ways to look at this film. If you compare it to other Troma movies from this era it's pretty much complete garbage. On the other hand if you put it side by side with anything made by Troma since the 80s ended it looks fantastic! So take your pick. Personally I always have the lowest expectations whenever I bother watching anything made(or even released) by Troma studios, which isn't very often, so it wasn't as bad as I had anticipated. If you enjoy watching little kids and teenagers being murdered over and over again that's pretty much the whole ending of the film so add bonus points for that. The plot is very simple and very stupid about a little boy whose dad gets caught in a beartrap so he naturally has to live in the woods forever after that. He grows up to learn advanced brainwashing techniques that he employs on all the children in the area to form his own gang/cult of murderous cannibals. In response the local townsfolk turn into raving religious nutsos who don't mind doing a little murdering of their own. It sounds a lot better than it actually is but the violence and blood(and even some teenager on mom rape to liven things up!) are thankfully abundant enough to ward off any excessive boredom.